From The New York Times:
Dear Diary:
There’s a barber on Lispenard Street who not only cuts hair but replaces watch batteries as well.
Since my girlfriend loves the way he cuts my hair, I thought I’d have him replace the battery in a watch I had inherited.
I dropped the watch off and waited almost three weeks to pick it up, only to learn from the barber that the watch didn’t work, battery notwithstanding.
I was crushed. I went to Grand Central Watch in the hopes that somehow, my barber was wrong.
He was. And when I picked up the repaired watch from the shop, I had a question.
“By the way,” I said, “do you cut hair?”
Laugh of the Day
- The Sultan of SoWhat
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- BostonCharlie
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Re: Laugh of the Day
LOL -- I was hoping it was a personal testimony, but then I noticed the first line. Unless, maybe, you wrote the NYT?
For lack of a better thread, and perhaps it deserves a laugh, I posit that a guy must get drunk once in awhile -- properly drunk. Just to shake things up. It was only with a suitable application of alcohol that I realized that as long as I've lived in the suburbs I've felt like I was camping. Is that stupid or what? And I brought it here for your evaluation. Meaning: I think of you, my electronic friends, as brothers. Cheers, my friends. Somewhere, somebody, possibly in North Texas, embraces you.
For lack of a better thread, and perhaps it deserves a laugh, I posit that a guy must get drunk once in awhile -- properly drunk. Just to shake things up. It was only with a suitable application of alcohol that I realized that as long as I've lived in the suburbs I've felt like I was camping. Is that stupid or what? And I brought it here for your evaluation. Meaning: I think of you, my electronic friends, as brothers. Cheers, my friends. Somewhere, somebody, possibly in North Texas, embraces you.
- The Sultan of SoWhat
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Re: Laugh of the Day
--------BostonCharlie wrote: ↑Sun Feb 26, 2023 3:25 pm LOL -- I was hoping it was a personal testimony, but then I noticed the first line. Unless, maybe, you wrote the NYT?
For lack of a better thread, and perhaps it deserves a laugh, I posit that a guy must get drunk once in awhile -- properly drunk. Just to shake things up. It was only with a suitable application of alcohol that I realized that as long as I've lived in the suburbs I've felt like I was camping. Is that stupid or what? And I brought it here for your evaluation. Meaning: I think of you, my electronic friends, as brothers. Cheers, my friends. Somewhere, somebody, possibly in North Texas, embraces you.
Not my personal testimony.*
We all embrace you back!
-------------
*However, I have written about hair at least 3 times on my blog:
https://drnormalvision.blogspot.com/201 ... oints.html
https://drnormalvision.blogspot.com/2014/11/hair.html
https://drnormalvision.blogspot.com/201 ... today.html
Re: Laugh of the Day
BostonCharlie wrote: ↑Sun Feb 26, 2023 3:25 pm LOL -- I was hoping it was a personal testimony, but then I noticed the first line. Unless, maybe, you wrote the NYT?
For lack of a better thread, and perhaps it deserves a laugh, I posit that a guy must get drunk once in awhile -- properly drunk. Just to shake things up. It was only with a suitable application of alcohol that I realized that as long as I've lived in the suburbs I've felt like I was camping. Is that stupid or what? And I brought it here for your evaluation. Meaning: I think of you, my electronic friends, as brothers. Cheers, my friends. Somewhere, somebody, possibly in North Texas, embraces you.
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"Remember no man is a failure who has friends." - Clarence Odbody
- rich_in_the_lou
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Re: Laugh of the Day
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic. He put a sign up outside that said, "Dr. Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr. Geezer's clinic. This is what transpired:
Dr. Young: "Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?"
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Yuck, this is gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days, figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory; I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "No, last time that was gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak; I can hardly see anything!"
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that, so here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
Moral of story-- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "Old Geezer"!
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr. Geezer's clinic. This is what transpired:
Dr. Young: "Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?"
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Yuck, this is gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days, figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory; I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "No, last time that was gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak; I can hardly see anything!"
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that, so here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
Moral of story-- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "Old Geezer"!
- The Sultan of SoWhat
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- BostonCharlie
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Re: Laugh of the Day
That is pretty funny. There are some weird sci. fi. things like the WV porcine with digits and the demonic gal from Oklahoma. Rounding error? Or motes of an AI subconscious? The fact the people all appear to be of (ahem) European descent suggests to me that the Europeans are to a large extent projecting themselves onto us, lol.The Sultan of SoWhat wrote: ↑Tue Jul 11, 2023 8:24 pm This is falling-down-on-the-floor funny:
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/asked-a ... 00212.html